water conservation for the rest of us

here is what I came up with for my guest-blog spot on andromeda*arts. enjoy:

we’re in the middle of a water shortage and conservation is the hot new buzzword this summer. so i figured i’d do a post on creative water conservation tips you won’t find elsewhere. yup …

1. drink imported beer instead of water. this way you don’t waste our precious local water reserves (or the precious water reserves that go into local beer). and if you get drunk enough you can conveniently pass out, and forget about all our problems
2. shower at the gym. many gyms have actually turned down the water pressure to deal with the water crisis. also, there is something about public showering that really makes you get in, tend to the essentials and get out. i mean, how many of us want to take ponderous, lingering showers in the company of smelly strangers? and for those of you that like ponderous, lingering showers in public - burning man starts next week.
3. use the toilet at home. that way you can avoid the flush and “keep it mellow” as long as possible. keeping it mellow in public restrooms is not considered polite.
4. if you have a child, use an inflatable bath tub. much less water consumed than filling up a regular bath. if you do not have a child see tip 1.
5. vote obama, support open source software and ride a bike. haven’t quite figured out how to tie these in to water conservation, but i figured it couldn’t hurt, and it gets me up to the magic number of 5.

that’s all i got folks.